i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
