i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
