I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
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