is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Randomize
