Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Randomize
