those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
I FOUND THE LEGS
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
