i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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