Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
