I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
