So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Randomize
