I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
smell my finger.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Randomize