New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Randomize
