yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Randomize
