Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Randomize
