I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Randomize
