You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
