Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
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