We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
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