There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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