I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
