we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
