Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Randomize
