She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
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