i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
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