Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Four minutes until I can fart!
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
