So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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