my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize
