it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
