all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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