some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I wear drunk well.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
