I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
