My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Randomize
