I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
