We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
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