I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize