omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
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