YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
