Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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