My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
