Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
