My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Blow job season was short but glorious.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
