But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize