i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
