Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Randomize