Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
