I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Randomize
