oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Randomize
