Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
wow bdsm is so cute
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize
