well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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