She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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